The Significance of a Sidewalk
I really want to talk about the scene where Holden feels like he's going to fall through the road whenever he steps off a sidewalk curb (this takes place the morning after he leaves Mr. Antolini's home). Although this scene was very brief, I saw an immediate connection to the passage where Holden sees a little boy walking on the road right beside the curb instead of the sidewalk, while singing "if a body catch a body coming through the rye" carefreely. I just found this contrast too great. While Holden almost has a mental breakdown every time he has to leave the safety of the sidewalk, the boy just nonchalantly strolled down the road while several cars whizzed past him. I think this kind of signifies how Holden is so far gone from being an innocent child without a care in the world. There's no way that Holden can go back to having that innocence as a child no matter how hard he tries to avoid adulthood.
I also saw a parallel between this scene and a line that Mr. Antolini says to Holden, which was "I have a feeling that you're riding for some kind of a terrible, terrible fall. But I don't honestly know what kind..." This quote seemed very significant in the context of Holden being afraid of going "down, down, down" and not being able to the other side of the street because maybe Mr. Antolini kinda planted that idea of a "terrible fall" in Holden's head? Although it's just something I noticed and I'm not quite sure what this connection is really signifying about Holden.
Another thing in this scene that I thought was pretty significant was the fact that Holden did NOT want to sink down in the road and never see anyone again. There have been several instances throughout the book where Holden is totally indifferent about dying like that time where he talked about how he wouldn't complain if he were in the front line of a firing squad and he'd sit on top of an atomic bomb, etc. However, in this scene, every single time that Holden had to cross the street and step off the curb of the sidewalk, he would plead to Allie, constantly repeating "please don't let me disappear", showing how in actuality, he truly wants to live even if he has to coexist with a phony society.
I think the points you bring up are rather interesting - especially the ones you make about Mr. Antolini. When reading that scene, I remember thinking that it was a very cryptic and pessimistic thing for someone who Holden practically idolizes to say. If I had to guess, I would think that Mr. Antolini is hinting at a time where Holden will finally have to come to terms with the fact that he is growing up. Mr. Antolini is telling Holden that he can't "stop time" by flunking out of schools and spending money - eventually he'll have to shoulder some responsibility. Meanwhile, Holden's actual feeling of falling could be the physical representation of this idea. Holden realizes that crossing the street, or journeying through life, is much more difficult and arduous than he originally perceived. I think this could be the point where Holden realizes that phoniness isn't necessarily produced because people are inherently bad, it's their circumstances that shape such behavior.
ReplyDeleteI think it is interesting to note that the fear he was experiencing was completely in his head. He was never going to disappear before he reached the end of the block. Holden may have lost his innocence but it is still very clear that he has not grown up. He is still playing a an almost childish game with himself but it translates into real dread for Holden.
ReplyDeleteBy this point in the novel, it seems like Holden has hit rock bottom. He's delusional to the point where we can barely recognize him. For much of the book, at least to me, it felt like Holden's thoughts were what made him feel safe. Even if he had opinions that he didn't outright say to people, his internal dialogue kept him sane by giving the space to express his complaints. In this scene, because he's in such a poor mental state, Holden seems a lot more vulnerable since he can't rely on his thoughts anymore and is forced to face reality head-on.
ReplyDeleteThe connection to the little kid singing "just for the hell of it" is great--Holden no longer has that same innocence, and now he has this hyperbolic sense of risk every time he crosses the road. I'll also note that at various points in this sequence, he refers to himself as recklessly crossing the street, "damn near" getting himself killed (when he runs to get stationery to write a note to Phoebe)--as when he runs across the highway on the way to Spencer's earlier. The street is a place of hazard and risk, with all these (adult-driven) cars and buses speeding around. But in the scenes you mention, there is no obvious risk from traffic--as Ryland rightly notes, the entire thing exists in Holden's head, a kind of higher-stakes version of a "don't step on the cracks" kind of game. But the fact that he *talks to Allie* to "save" him is especially striking here--again, as Ryland says, "real dread."
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to add to what you said about how his actions when he leaves the sidewalk shows that he is far from being an innocent child. I also thought about how his pleading to Allie showed how he knew that he was getting lost, and how he was falling deeper and deeper into a state that he despises and feels trapped in. I feel like he's having such a hard time as he tries to reach and grasp anything he can to hold on to whatever life and childhood innocence he has. Also, I like how you referred to the phrase "if a body catch a body coming through the rye". It reminded me about how he said he wanted to be the catcher in the rye. It seems like Holden feels like he's among those children, trying to hold on to anything he can to stop himself from falling into the rye.
ReplyDeleteI kind of overlooked the scene you discussed here as somewhat insignificant but the ideas you have are really interesting. It makes sense that his growing fear of adulthood increases his awareness of this fear and other aspects of himself, but it's pretty ironic to see this growth correlated with his coming of age. In a way, this pattern sets him up for the changes that he experiences by the end of the novel.
ReplyDeleteThe ideas you bring up are very interesting and I didn't even come close to making these connections while I was reading. I think the striking difference between Holden and the little boy are very interesting and I agree with your analysis of it. Holden is not at all innocent like the little boy, but he desperately wishes he could be. He doesn't want to fall through the street, rather to be able to walk on it without fear like the little boy can.
ReplyDeleteThat's very interesting. I didn't even really make that connection. It is interesting to me how Holden longs for childhood innocence, when he is far past this point. He has such a negative view on life, which is quite the opposite of how children view the world. In this scene, his mental state seems to be at its worst, so it makes sense that he would wish that he could go back to childhood when life was simple and a lot happier.
ReplyDeleteThis post is perfect for showing Holden's poor mental state. You can see how much he longs for innocence, to be young again. Throughout the novel he rejects coming-of-age and I believe it is because of a fear of his own mind. He no longer wants to overanalyze, overthink everything but rather, just peacefully walk along the street as that little boy would.
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